It's not the others, it's you

I was reading de Mello again, when I rediscovered something important. When facing problems in life, we have the tendency to blame someone else. For example, someone might feel that his or her relationship is not working because the partner always does this or that. Someone else might not like her or his job because it is too demanding, not demanding enough, it has a bad atmosphere or this and that.
No. The job does not have a problem, you have a problem. Your partner in the relationship does not have a problem, you have a problem. It's you. You have a problem. You are the reason for your problems. It is painful to admit that you are guilty, but the pain exist just because it is true.
You can hardly expect everybody else to change to suit your particular preferences. You must change. You must change your attitude or you must change your habits.

EDIT: You can change your habits.